Dear David,
Here’s a conglomerate of thoughts as we celebrate our 10 year anniversary. They aren’t smoothed out, maybe a little jumbled, but fun to think about.
“What first brought us together?”
Dance, friendship, attraction. Our close friends were a part of all of that too! God is good, and has good plans for your life. Seek Him first and all else will be added to you.
You are attractive to me. You’re eyes, your kind heart, the person that you are. When I see your tall, dark and handsome self walk through the door, I want to be in your arms with your lips to mine. When we were first married, you’d call me to say you were heading home from work, and I’d start walking to meet you. With every step of getting closer to you, my heart would start beating faster, excitement, anticipation, the thrill of knowing I’m so close to seeing you again. I still feel that way!
After you came to ask Jesus to be your Lord and Savior, I strongly considered breaking my contract to go teach in Japan for a year. But I didn’t want to get in the way of you growing in your relationship with God on your own. And I had a trust that if God meant for us to be together, He would do so. I didn’t have to worry.
“What has kept us together all these years?”
Friendship, attraction, God’s goodness.
As humans, we make mistakes, we fail each other at times. But if we trust in something higher than ourselves, trusting in God who put us together in the first place… we can trust that He will keep us together. He has a purpose for us to be together, and we want to be used for His glory.
I never quite realized just how wonderful marriage would be. I knew it would be great. But because it’s you I’m married to, it’s better than I could ever have dreamed!
“What has kept us in love all these years?”
It’s not anything that we have done on our own. It’s not “look how great we are at loving each other”…it’s, “Wow! Look at how God loves me through you! I’m so blown away at what a good gift He gave me in you! I’m so grateful for you in my life, I want to take care of you, and love you with all that I am.”
Realizing that where you spend the most time is who or what you have a relationship with, whether it’s t.v., the internet, dance, or that special someone. Prioritizing each other. Choosing togetherness. Even when babies necessitate most or our attention and care, making choices that say you are my closest friend and lover, I choose to share my life with you everyday.
Believing the best in each other. Giving each other wings to fly with our dreams. Giving love and kindness in generous proportions. Everyday little things. Celebrating life in both small ways and big ways.
I was so excited for you to get to play basketball with your coworkers. I grew up playing on soccer teams, and loved the camaraderie, teamwork, achieving a goal with a group. Band was like that for me too. So when you got a chance to experience that too, I was so excited to be your biggest fan! I kind of made fun of cheer leaders when in high school, but here I found myself wanting to be one!
I love creating with you: dance, photography, music, cooking, analyzing movies.
I love serving with you: caring for our kids, our family and friends
I love it that even though you’re not super adventurous, you go along with, and even encourage my crazy adventures. Snorkeling in Maui, taking us to China, going to dance events and dancing till 3am, GAPS.
I love that you are there for me, whether I just need you to come home and hold me, or to hold my hand through giving birth to our babies.
I love that you make me laugh. Your goofy dances when you think I’m not looking!
I love that you calm me down. You are very healing to me. You rub my feet most every night. You take my pain away.
I love that you are thoughtful of every angle before making a decision. Even if it drives me bonkers, I respect that you take great pains to make a wise decision on things.
Agreeing that when fighting, it’s more important to be right in relationship with each other than to be right.
If I were to give a toast to you on our anniversary, this is what I would say:
“10 years ago, I wasn’t sure how well I could be a wife to you when I was so ill and in bed a lot. It was uncertain what was making me sick and how long of a life I would live. You told me you still wanted me, and you wanted to give me the best possible life I could have. And you have! Thank you for asking me to marry you! Thank you for bringing much healing and happiness to my life! I love you, and I am looking forward to the next 10 years and beyond!”